tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post7184356501240778501..comments2023-10-02T16:19:55.641+01:00Comments on A dad's perspective: What's normal?Matt Davishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-12698174708681523422014-01-07T18:56:55.924+00:002014-01-07T18:56:55.924+00:00Ben, bless you. Am inspired by your words. MxBen, bless you. Am inspired by your words. MxMatt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-2898283017770296632014-01-07T18:35:48.794+00:002014-01-07T18:35:48.794+00:00Thanks very much for this. I'm delighted to be...Thanks very much for this. I'm delighted to be shoulder to shoulder with you too, living these experiences as a father. Send me a message/tweet whenever you want to share stuff, or just chat. MattMatt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-85233830181849010262014-01-07T18:30:14.469+00:002014-01-07T18:30:14.469+00:00Your experiences highlight the dilemma so vividly....Your experiences highlight the dilemma so vividly. You say you get a sense of relief hearing my story - it's reciprocated. I hope your son finds contentment - and you too. MattMatt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-74537443321538476762014-01-02T15:17:58.083+00:002014-01-02T15:17:58.083+00:00Hey Matt,
Another stunning , insightful piece of ...Hey Matt,<br /><br />Another stunning , insightful piece of writing which makes me feel like I'm shoulder to shoulder with you in my experiences as a Dad of a beautiful autistic boy. You capture the wild uncapturables of autism with such clarity, humour and heartache ( and with not a smudge of self pity or sentimentality). Thanks again buddy , Matt Matt Robinsonnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-16234839201652655382013-12-28T11:06:04.662+00:002013-12-28T11:06:04.662+00:00I can empathize with you and have a 12 year old s...I can empathize with you and have a 12 year old son who has gone from mainstream primary school to a wonderful special school. Unfortunately my son is very unhappy with the children he is surrounded by and longs for the comfort of his "normal mainstream" friends and school environment. High functioning autism gives the opportunity to learn "normality" but also hinders the need to "fit in" to social groups. As a parent the question of doing the right thing seems to be the only consistency that other parents can relate to. I get a great sense of relief when I read or hear from other parents like yourself who have such a familiar story. Thank you for sharing your story. jennynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-56795015762538117472013-12-27T12:51:58.472+00:002013-12-27T12:51:58.472+00:00Again intensely insightful without falling into th...Again intensely insightful without falling into the self-pitying sentimentality in which I would inevitably find myself wallowing confronted with such circumstances. A genuine exploration of the torturous and tedious at times paradoxes, many parents of autistic kids must feel, torn by the desire for 'normality' and the love of awe you must feel for your children of which autism is a core strand/s of their identity - good and bad. The more I read these blogs, Matty, the more I think a more expansive book on the subject from you could be ground-breaking for parents of autistic children and those not familiar with the condition. No gush - you have a gift - use it - this blog is part of it, but I sincerely think you need a bigger platform and the world needs to read what you have to say. In my book, that's the definition of when it's time to write a book. Do it, mate - it's important for you and...fug it, our society as a whole. Much love, Ben. Bennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-45233591477290770072013-12-24T10:55:18.945+00:002013-12-24T10:55:18.945+00:00Interesting to hear that the 'normalise' d...Interesting to hear that the 'normalise' debate is relevant to other conditions. Thanks for sharing, MattMatt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-31928182440601406002013-12-24T10:53:19.212+00:002013-12-24T10:53:19.212+00:00Such a positive to hold on to - that, as you say, ...Such a positive to hold on to - that, as you say, 'people with ASD have greater understanding and opportunities than ever before'. Thanks for reading the blog and your comments. MattMatt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-13603404441270695282013-12-24T10:49:47.592+00:002013-12-24T10:49:47.592+00:00Thanks, Liv! Love to all. MattyThanks, Liv! Love to all. MattyMatt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-80397214576330878372013-12-24T10:32:24.008+00:002013-12-24T10:32:24.008+00:00It's a pleasure. Always comforting to hear peo...It's a pleasure. Always comforting to hear people's similar experiences. Will look out for your blog.Matt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-38837314543866585682013-12-24T10:31:16.612+00:002013-12-24T10:31:16.612+00:00'An equality of understanding and support'...'An equality of understanding and support'...how brilliantly put. Thank you for such insight and for reading the blog.<br />MattMatt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-47334659727378796802013-12-24T10:29:19.388+00:002013-12-24T10:29:19.388+00:00Hearing this is uplifting in the extreme. I take g...Hearing this is uplifting in the extreme. I take great heart from your story. Thanks for sharing. Matt<br />Matt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-45763500320781593682013-12-24T10:26:57.610+00:002013-12-24T10:26:57.610+00:00That's very kind of you. So glad it speaks to ...That's very kind of you. So glad it speaks to you. I blog every month or two.<br />MattMatt Davishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771082590470237027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-7799183051506676612013-12-20T01:27:25.893+00:002013-12-20T01:27:25.893+00:00Beautifully enlightening.
Beautifully enlightening.<br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18321299911359337114noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-8834083315191259982013-12-19T21:11:44.237+00:002013-12-19T21:11:44.237+00:00If I had any skills in writing, I might have captu...If I had any skills in writing, I might have captured something similar. Thank you for this. It speaks to me (us) loudly and clearly. I look forward to reading more.<br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07066530003625221591noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-4524951628528724412013-12-19T16:19:25.814+00:002013-12-19T16:19:25.814+00:00I'm constantly torn between the desire for the...I'm constantly torn between the desire for the world to adapt to my son Jonah, aged 8 and diagnosed with moderate Asperger's, and for Jonah to fit into it. I feel, while it can be frustrating for him at time, pulled towards the latter because I just don't think the world's going to adapt quick enough to always meet his needs, for all he's lucky to be born into a word where people with ASD have greater understanding and opportunities than ever before.To educate him about the potential effects of his condition has become the clearest route to help him, if not adapt, then to understand why he doesn't always view the world the same way as everyone else. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-62050700947652652262013-12-19T12:19:14.710+00:002013-12-19T12:19:14.710+00:00My autie takes hundreds of images of still life on...My autie takes hundreds of images of still life on his ipad, I did write about it on my blog this year. Like you, we also were looking anxiously for any "special needs" signs when our younger son was born, I must say this anxiety spoiled a lot of things, instead of enjoying his babyhood I was always on the lookout for anything that might be interpreted as autism.<br />Thank you for your beautiful and emotional post.Galina Varesehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10113049600313050157noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-42602344022876734112013-12-19T12:06:44.318+00:002013-12-19T12:06:44.318+00:00The 'normalising' conundrum is such an imp...The 'normalising' conundrum is such an important issue in this age of equality and diversity. In our well intentioned appraoch of inclusivity we can so easily forget that equality does not mean seeking to 'do the same' for all children but should be about offering an equality of understanding and support, in relation to what a child really needs. We also seem intent upon defining what it is to develop 'normally' to such a degree that we risk excluding more and more children and definitely NOT offering an equality of understanding and support. Using the square peg and the round hole analogy, if the round hole was larger, the square peg (and all the other shapes!) could fit through it. And we'd have a truly diverse community, benefitting us all.Yvonne Hainesnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-33490171486798136552013-12-19T11:23:56.899+00:002013-12-19T11:23:56.899+00:00My son was lucky to go to a mainstream primary sch...My son was lucky to go to a mainstream primary school where they worked very very hard to include him and to ensure that pupils in the school understood some of the challenges of Aspergers. Despite that he struggled increasingly as he went though the school and elected to withdraw from the class for the majority of the time. He now goes to a specialist secondary school (residential) where all the children are on the spectrum. Now his difficulties are 'normal' and his humour and personality can shine. I will never forget the first visit to his school, the world of opportunity and experience that suddenly opened where there had only been challenges. He still has autism and other complex needs, but that is not the thing that all the people around him see. The difference has been astonishing. I hope you & your son are as lucky.Jacqui Hardinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16606319773718155835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-23625283351962939132013-12-19T11:23:20.002+00:002013-12-19T11:23:20.002+00:00I'm bipolar, so I sympathise completely with t...I'm bipolar, so I sympathise completely with the father's desire not to allow Isaac to be 'normalised'.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17068760171063578367noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3291060742081310510.post-70348220773821548942013-12-18T20:33:31.867+00:002013-12-18T20:33:31.867+00:00So so beautifulSo so beautifulAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com